I Hate To See You Go, But I Don’t Believe You Anymore

I’ve written this piece to address the epidemic of social media-driven lives and the toll they have taken on the human spirit. When did the world convince us that we should compete for the best false perception?

What happens when we get too comfortable where we are? When we want so badly for a place to look just like who we want to be inside, but can’t really see who that is behind our pain? So instead, we hang our dreams and paint our futures on the walls. We live there in our made up life, hoping others won’t see beyond what we’ve created, in a place that looks picture perfect.

Do we eventually forget where there is? What if living in our comfortable creation means we miss out on seeing the truth beyond the walls? And maybe the truth within them.

What happens when comfortable is walking on broken glass and suffocating feels like breathing? When nobody notices we are living a lie? What happens when nobody can tell the difference?

When will we begin to notice that the perfect walls have long caved in, the pictures all have shattered, and pain has scattered dreams across the floor?

What happens then, when comfortable ignorance caused the rubble, but came disguised as something safe? Yet we step through jagged pieces, across masks we’ve kept up hope with, to retrieve once-pretty pictures, just to feel the comfort of pretending once again.

What happens when we cling to what we’ve salvaged, from the clutches of our pride, to hang back on the nails protruding from the wreckage? Torn and tattered pretty pictures, because what once was comfortable promised us a beautiful place, a beautiful life that would hide the pain. Yes we’re sure that we are worthy to continue the facade. We believe that we must show that we are worthy, of a picture perfect life.

What happens then, when we persist, to make this damaged, demolished place look like the life that it had been, and try again with pretty pictures and painted dreams to hide the truth that comfort brings? But what if this time no one sees? What happens when we’re the only ones? The time has come to make a change.

What happens if we step beyond the broken, past the pretty fractured scene of crumbled hopes and painted dreams and out into the daylight? Finally exposed, stripped of the comforts of that place, would we see others standing at their doorsteps too? Bags in hand, searching now for what was promised within?

What happens when we see perhaps, their bags are empty? Nothing left to hide behind. Would we be ready then? Where does one go when they leave what’s comfortable? Would we go looking for it again? What if, what we found was more? What if this time it was real?

Pain is just a place, don’t live there. It cannot travel with you unless you pack it up and carry it along.

So visit if you must, but leave it behind when you’re ready to move on. Don’t try to paint over it to create something you can live with and pretend it’s comfortable enough. Because to survive, we must be ready to move. We must be ready to leave what’s comfortable, what’s fabricated, behind. If not, pain will seep through walls and demolish every picture perfect place again and again.

A pretty life hides pain within its walls. To leave that comfort for what’s real, we must step outside and see the truth- that we are stronger when we move on without it.

And that truth is standing on every doorstep- those who have survived the collapse of pain and had the courage not to stay trapped by it’s silent stranglehold. They too sought to build the same four walls to hide their pain in pretty pictures and painted lies. Don’t follow along to find your truth. Venture out. You are certainly not alone. Start a new journey where there are no walls.

Nothing is as perfect as it seems. Leave it. Leave it all. But do take the pretty, broken pictures of your dreams. Torn and tattered, scarred with pain, this is beauty. They’re the only thing that’s real.

Hang the imperfect reflections of your journey everywhere you go from here. Encourage those who really see them to do the same. Show the world that pain cannot take refuge behind lies. And it can only cave in on you when you give it a home and make it feel comfortable. Be braver than what’s picture perfect. Dreams are never buried, they become reality only when we finally see each other and stop feeling comfortable.

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